He Would've Been 22 Today

Today is my friend's birthday but he is no longer alive. He would have been 22 today. A little over a year ago on May 1, 2011, he was shot in the head and pronounced dead on the scene. At the time, all I was worried about was final exams and where to host my 21st birthday dinner with friends, not knowing that my friend was dead. I found out about the incident a month and 6 days later in June after he had been buried and called/texted everyone I knew that knew him to confirm it because I refused to believe it. My heart literally was in pain. The shock of the news gave me physical pains and I just couldn't grasp it all. That entire day, my mind flooded with thoughts of him. That night, I dreamt about him throughout the night into the following morning. I went through his facebook, staring at his picture. I found myself daydreaming about him and was completely distracted at work. It was so painful to bear. Tears were not even to express my sadness. How could he be dead? Not just dead, but murdered!! Writing this still shocks me because it's so hard to believe that it is true. Is he really gone? Forever? Wow. Only God knows how much my heart aches for him when I think about him. It hurts me so bad.

I remember meeting him in August 2005 at Booker T. Washington High School and the High School for engineering professions. I was a 9th grader and he was a 10th grader. We rode the same school bus because we lived fairly close to each other. We endured the long school bus rides with broken seats and  no A/C up until his senior year, my junior year of high school. During those hour and a half bus rides, we would talk about any and everything. When we did stop talking during the trip, it was because he needed to finish his homework. He loved doing homework on the bus to pass time even though the bus rides were so bumpy. He had this fascination with biology that I couldn't understand. I hate biology, hence why I'm a chemistry major in college now, but he loved it. He had dreams of being a neurosurgeon and therefore I addressed him with "Dr." in front of his name because I believed in  him. Contrary to what most people saw him as during his senior year of high school, I knew he had a good heart and could really become someone great in life. He showed me the soft and gentle side of him that most people never got to see and I am grateful to have witnessed it. I prayed for him daily and cared for him. It was always my hope that he would rebound from what was happening and be so great that people will be shock and be embarrassed for doubting him. I prayed. I pray....I prayed.

We lost touch once he graduated but he never left my mind. I would randomly remember him and try to contact him and the last time I heard from him, he was doing well and that was that. Never in a million years did I think that a day like this will come, where I am found writing about him in past tense. I miss him and oh how I wished things ended differently. My friend is now a case number in the homicide department in Harris county, Houston, TX. Wow. If this pains me this much a year after it happened, I can not imagine what his family is going through. I pray that God will comfort them all. May they find joy in knowing that their son/brother/cousin/friend was loved.

I pray that we all learn to live everyday like it is our last because "yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift...that's why it's called the present." Most time as young people, the devil feeds us the lie that we can live our life anyhow we please(YOLO) as they know coin it, and then when we get old, we can then give our life to Christ, but this is a lie! Tomorrow is not promised to anyone. God desires us in the days of our youth! Do not put your salvation on hold because everyday you are alive, is a day closer, a minute closer, and a second closer to the day you will die. Live for Christ NOW!

"Remember your Creator in the days of your youth, before the days of trouble come and the years approach when you will say, "I find no pleasure in them"-- Ecclesiastes 12:1

 Let us also be mindful of the people we invite into our lives because they influence us (in a good way or in a bad way) more than we give credit for. The Bible even says

"Do not be misled: "Bad company corrupts good character."- 1 Corinthians 15:33 

Your destiny can change simply by those you hang around with.  Some "friends" are just not good for you and no friendship is worth your salvation. If you need to cut people off to make Heaven, so be it. Let Go. It is my earnest prayer that the Lord helps every reading this to truly seek Him everyday. May we all live to declare the goodness of God. May our lives reflect His glory, and when it is all over, May God welcome us into His kingdom. Amen.

In Memory of "Dr." Kendrick Ross

I love you. I miss you. 

Yorkamazing <3

Today's Memory Verse (T.M.V)

Psalm 90:12 

"Teach us to number our days, that we may apply our hearts towards wisdom"